Archive for Self-Sabotage

Your Inner Prostitute: Selling Out to Survive vs. Self-Respect

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I’m not calling you whores, per se. Tee hee. We all think ‘sex-for-money’ when we hear the word prostitution. Forget that. That’s not my focus here. I’m talking about archetypes, an ancient and universal concept of what it means to prostitute one’s self. Wha…?  A Couple Definitions To Prostitute:  To sell parts of one’s Self [...]

2 Secret Self-Esteem Tools for Tackling Your Self-Hate (Part 1)

I’m re-reading a remarkable, practical self-help book, Self-Esteem, which is in its third edition and subtitled, A proven program of cognitive techniques for assessing, improving & maintaining your self-esteem. Between them, the authors, Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning have written many, many other self-help guides as well.  The first time I read Self-Esteem, and then [...]

Does Hesitation Hold You Back from Truly Engaging with Life?

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Hesitant when asked to do something?  Always want to know what’s going to happen–when, where, how long, and who’s going to be there?  Cautious?  Wary?  Unable to wholly trust others? Yes, and of course. With all the chaos around us as children, caution and being slow-to-trust makes complete and utter, not-your-fault, 100% sense. In his [...]

Before You Can Build Trust in Yourself through Self-Control (and Stop Self-Sabotage)…Ya Gotta Let Go!

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I just can’t keep myself from writing about self-control again.  Must be a lack of… Last post, I wrote about how another person’s self-control makes them seem more trustworthy to us (based on the results of a recent study). And vice-versa:  they also found that when others’ self-control was erratic, people had trouble trusting them. [...]

Scared? Stuck? Hey Fear, Back Off—I’ve Got Options and a Process!

Something I learned from my therapist not long ago is that when I have a clear sense of alternatives, of options, that not only do I immediately feel less stuck, saner, but I can also then be moved into action.  That is, I perceive that not only do alternatives and options exist in life in [...]