Archive for Intimacy

On Beginning a New Relationship (When Your Childhood Wasn’t ‘Normal’)

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[Dedicated to N.S. Thanks for asking!] Recently a reader asked me for some thoughts on beginning relationships. I said I’d reply in a post, because there have got to be others asking this same question, right?  Some of these ideas come from a chapter in a book I’m writing (exciting! exciting!) which is based on [...]

Watch…and Listen! ‘The Faults of Others’ Video and Radio Show

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Sunday October 7th – This morning on our Blog Talk Radio show, Susan and I talked about the tendency to forget to focus on our own work and, rather, habitually focus on the issues and faults of others. Oops. This was show #6 in our series of thirteen shows on empowering solutions for the trauma [...]

Your Inner Prostitute: Selling Out to Survive vs. Self-Respect

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I’m not calling you whores, per se. Tee hee. We all think ‘sex-for-money’ when we hear the word prostitution. Forget that. That’s not my focus here. I’m talking about archetypes, an ancient and universal concept of what it means to prostitute one’s self. Wha…?  A Couple Definitions To Prostitute:  To sell parts of one’s Self [...]

Your Radar’s Not Broken, You Know When Someone’s Bad for You

We feel so broken sometimes.  So put upon.  So tired.  Must we always have to re-do, do-over, re-jigger, and work so, so hard to have a normal, right, life? Depends on how you look at it. The un-chosen, poorly-tuned, oblivious life isn’t very rewarding, so in that sense the oh-so-hard work is worth it.  And, [...]

Anti-Intuitive, I Know: If You Breathe in Pain You Can Diffuse It and Make Way For Hope

The pain of others, that is. Who would want to breathe in, inhale, suck up the pain, illness, and damage that’s in others? Eww. That was the train of thought that started, reactively, in my mind as I read a really interesting (and life-enhancing) article, “Love & Emptiness,” in the magazine Shambhala Sun. (The January [...]