We feel so broken sometimes. So put upon. So tired. Must we always have to re-do, do-over, re-jigger, and work so, so hard to have a normal, right, life? Depends on how you look at it. The un-chosen, poorly-tuned, oblivious life isn’t very rewarding, so in that sense the oh-so-hard work is worth it. And, [...]
Ever had trouble saying goodbye, ending a conversation, leaving, or getting people out of your house? Have you ever noticed that at some point during a conversation or visit that you’re ready for it to end but that you can’t seem to make it end? As if you’re…a prisoner of the conversation? That has happened [...]
This is the final post in a four-part series by One Angry Daughter, who shares her experience and resources for Adult Children of Narcissists on her blog, One Angry Daughter Still Striving for Acceptance My journey has come full circle when it comes to acceptance. In the beginning I was still a child seeking the [...]
This is the third post in a four-part series by One Angry Daughter, who shares her experience and resources for Adult Children of Narcissists on her blog, One Angry Daughter What's Next? Due to all the strong emotions attached to the NPD-inflicted loved one, the first instinct is to try to save the relationship. [...]
This is the second post in a four-part series by One Angry Daughter, who shares her experience and resources for Adult Children of Narcissists on her blog, One Angry Daughter A Diagnosis After I was done explaining the situation with my family and my mom in particular, the therapist declared that “less is more [...]
This is the first of a four-part series by One Angry Daughter, who shares her experience and resources for Adult Children of Narcissists on her blog, One Angry Daughter Turning Point I was weeks shy from the birth of my first child, when I found myself in the office of a therapist. On the eve [...]
If you grew up with alcoholic parents, addicts, or otherwise self-centered, child-like parents, you are already familiar with (if not enraged by) narcissism. Sometimes, the most infuriating fact of interacting with a narcissistic family member is, well, something that’s impossible to avoid: talking with them–having “conversation.” I can’t help put conversation in quotes because conversations with [...]
Hi Amy. My name is Lisa, and I found a link to your blog on Wikipedia today on the article discussing “Adult children of Alcoholics”. I will just give you a little background about myself and my boyfriend: I grew up in a house where both my parents are teetotallers. The extent of my experience [...]
But, whose commitment issues are you most concerned about? Are you concerned about your ability to live up to commitments? Or, as you more concerned about the lack of someone else’s ability to commit? My guess is that we’re more concerned with the commitments that we wish other people would make to us than our own commitments. That’s classic ACA behavior (wishing that someone were “more” than what they are.) If you’re the over-achieving type of ACA, then you probably are very reliable and very critical of the inability of others to be just as reliable as you are. You may even unconsciously ‘test’ people on this.
We become lost in intimate relationships. We’re not sure exactly when it happens. Yet, it does. If our partner were to say, “Where are you going?” you’d likely say, “Wherever you’re going, wherever you want me to go.” Well, perhaps actually asked that question, you wouldn’t answer it that way. But, subconsciously that is the answer we give – it’s what we do. That is a state of ‘lost’ not just in your relationship, but in yourself. You recognize it physically as a feeling of being disoriented, fuzzy in the head, unsure of what you want, where you want to go, or even who you now are.
