Archive for Adult-Child Issues – Page 2

On Beginning a New Relationship (When Your Childhood Wasn’t ‘Normal’)


[Dedicated to N.S. Thanks for asking!] Recently a reader asked me for some thoughts on beginning relationships. I said I’d reply in a post, because there have got to be others asking this same question, right?  Some of these ideas come from a chapter in a book I’m writing (exciting! exciting!) which is based on [...]

Did I Make Reconciliation Possible? …”I Did the Best I Could.”


I’ve given more thought to the reconciliation of my stepmother.  I think there is more to the story then I originally thought. I think I may have laid the groundwork that made the moment possible — without realizing it. Background: I wrote this post about my stepmother’s reconciliation with me. That one stemmed from an [...]

On Authority Figure Issues & the Problem with The First 3 Steps of The 12 Steps of ACoA

blog art control face kids iStock_000000799542XSmall

Is the source of our authority figure issues in conflict with an ability to adapt 12 Step methods? Is the fact of a childhood during which parental/authority figures failed us in conflict with being able to put the first three steps to good use? Are those steps negotiable, nor non-negotiable? What’s at stake, in me, if [...]

Listen In! Getting Out from Under Approval-Seeking

Ear buds #2

Sunday morning. 7 a.m. Fog. And yet:  joy comes. Susan and I have a real conversation here and engage in some productive soul-scraping for y’all.  Today we talked about approval seeking, which was a means for survival as children in dysfunctional families, but gets in our way in our grown-up lives. Is agreeing with others [...]

Listen In! Our Interactions with Authority Figures, Real & Perceived

Ear buds #2

Ah, Sundays. The audio for yesterday’s Blog Talk Radio chat is live now (player below).  Thank you, Susan, for having me on your show and for the always revelatory exchanges! The show is 30 mins. Post comments below. On July 29th, Susan and I will be doing it again. Listen to internet radio with Susanks [...]