Notes from my Fiesta Day Talk – Loneliness, 4th Chakra, and Hero’s Journey

Thank you so much for the warm, loving welcome Bernal Heights! Here are some notes from my talk yesterday on Loneliness and Raw Feeling:

Definitions of Loneliness

Three ways of thinking about Loneliness:

Loneliness is being with and within raw feeling.

Wikipedia:  ”Complex and usually unpleasant emotional response to lack of companionship or isolation.”

4th Chakra, the Heart Chakra mantras:

“I love myself for who I am and the potential within me.” And, “I release the past into the hands of love.”

The book I quoted from was, The Places that Scare You: A Guide to Fearless in Difficult Times.

The Hero’s Journey

Here’s a link to a post I wrote about The Hero’s Journey, which I mentioned in my talk yesterday.


Ordinary World   (your present day, current life)
Call to Adventure   (the party invitation…or gut sense to end a relationship)
Refusal of the Call    (denial, magical thinking, wanting what society wants of you…hesitation, delay)
Meeting with the Mentor    (Yoda, therapist, your dreams, a book, outside guidance)
Crossing the First Threshold    (the first roadblock – favorite jeans stained, can’t afford to live alone)
Tests, Allies, Enemies     (‘you’re wearing that!?” or ‘why can’t couples stay together?’)
Approach to the Inmost Cave    (personal click, insight, point of no return, deeply wanting a different life)
The Ordeal    (moving van, logistics of the moment, walking to the party)
Reward    (sharing a laugh with a stranger at the party….the long exhale and joy of choosing YOU)
The Road Back    (you are new and you are returning to work, home, neighborhood)
The Resurrection    (this is the New You, color, strength, shining)
Return with the Elixir    (sponsorship, sharing your lessons, embodying the newness – returning with the sword from slaying the dragon)

If you’re a writer, here’s the book I referred to, The Writer’s Journey: Mythic Structure for Writers, on

And this is Joseph Campbell’s work on The Hero’s Journey, The Hero with a Thousand Faces, about human spiritual journeys.

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Feel free to post any questions or comments here.

Be kind to yourself.


  1. John S. says:

    Reading about and coming to understand The Hero’s Journey with the guidance of the magnificent Joseph Campbell years ago, changed my life. In reading your musings over the years Amy, as well as attending AcoA meetings, I have come to believe that most AcoA people have this experience thrust on them, whether they want it or not. And wonderful things are learned.

    But I also realize how fragile our grasp on the rewards of The Hero’s Journey is. We lack the support mechanisms and self-assurance that comes from being raised in healthy households, and all too often, struggle to maintain the richness gained from the experience.

    We don’t know how to reach out, we too often misplace our confidence in others unable to provide meaningful support when we do, and let go from our successes all too easy at times, believing that we didn’t truly deserve them in the first place.

    All I want to say to other AcoA people is, that if you have completed The Hero’s Journey, or realize you are on one now, don’t let go. The rewards are too great. You get to find out who your truly are, love and respect yourself for what you have learned.

    Joseph Campbell would say that you have found your Bliss. Once you do, hang on to it. Stay in that place, nurture your essence, don’t fall back into the mayhem that existed before your own Personal Journey began. Follow your Bliss. And if you should lose it, it will be there again when you are ready.

    And Amy, thanks for always being there when I need to find that one special voice “out there”.

    John S.

    • Amy Eden says:

      Thank you so much for this, John. I agree, and your observation that the Call is thrust upon us is really spot-on. Your comment has given me a lot to think about – misplaced confidence, for one.
      I very loosely patterned the Hero’s Journey to ACoAs during that S.F. talk…but having just mentioned the Journey yet again in a talk a couple weeks ago (Ignite), well, it actually didn’t occur me to dig deeper and examine it more thoroughly, perhaps more formally, but now it does. Thank you.

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