As promised – a photo of THE COUCH.
Soft as a rose petal.
Last Sunday I joined Susan of Empowering Solutions again to talk about problems and solutions for children of trauma, and told the story of purchasing my couch.
Somehow, in all the apartments and towns in which I’ve lived, this is the first purchase of its kind; I’ve purchased a couch as a couple, I’ve had roommates or boyfriends with couches, or (and this indeed happened twice) my aunt and uncle were also moving and gave me their redundant luxury furniture. Twice.
I hope you like the show (30 mins). I’d love to hear your thoughts about being comfortable in your own home, and what you believe you deserve when it comes to comfy furniture.
Susan and I are doing it again in two Sundays (June 17th).
Be kind to yourself.
Hi Amy! I just bought my first couch at age 52. Totally get what you were talking about regarding the struggle to create a safe and comfortable environment. And finally believing I deserve to be happy. Love your blog!
Thanks for sharing that Debra! It’s never too late, right?
Who knew that buying a couch would reveal so much – commitment doubts (How do I know I’m going to like this couch for a decade or longer?), self-esteem holes (I like this couch, do I deserve it?) as well as fear of being found out…too good to be true (If I love this couch and buy it, something will come up to forfeit my joy…) and on and on.
But, so far so good. The couch’s previous owner has not come to take it back! Nothing of the sort. I bought the couch and shortly after I got sick — and what a wonderful way to spend time on my new couch, resting and recuperating in comfort of my own creation.
Hi Amy and Susan:
I just got to listen to last Sunday’s discussion. It was easy to follow and clearly represented the typical childhood environment that we experienced as ACoAs. The varieties of our experiences left similar imprints on all of us. Thank you both for having these Sunday morning chats. Yay! for finding your comforting sofa. Claiming our space.
Breathe with ease
Carl
Great discussion Amy! What books do you recommend that help with the ACA grief process?
Hi Jane! For the grief process specifically?
“On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss” by none other than the grief “guru”, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. It’s $10 on Amazon.com.
(I don’t mean “guru” in the flip, sarcastic way.) EK-R has a way of describing Grief in this book that is about all grieving — not just the death of a spouse or loved one. It’s the first book to help me realize that the grief process isn’t specific to death.
Link to the book on Amazon -
http://www.amazon.com/Grief-Grieving-Finding-Meaning-Through/dp/0743266293/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1339509761&sr=1-4&keywords=grief
PS: If you purchase that book, be sure to read the Preface/Introduction by her co-author, he puts grief into different words and nicely contrasts/complements the author’s perspective.