Do You Have A Roomy Pot and Fertilizer (A Nurturing Environment in Which You Can Grow)?

I’ve been witness to two lessons from nature over the past several months. Both out in my garden and inside my house:

One: Given a roomy pot and some fertilizer a near-dead plant will flourish.

Two: A good pruning can re-focus a plant’s energy and allow it to flower.

We grow when the environment is right.
In fact, we can flourish in the right environment. It’s written in nature’s law book. I’ve seen it happen. I’ve felt it.

Your roomy pot and fertilizer cannot be dictated by anyone but the very You inside you.
Just because you have a “good” job or “cool” job doesn’t mean it’s the right one for the person inside you. The real You. It might please those around you, sure. Does your job (ahem, where you spend most of your time) play to your strengths? Does it allow you to feel energized?  Is it a good match?  (You know, not all the time or every single day, but we’re talking “enough” here or “most” of the time.)

Does your home environment nurture the You inside? If you’re creative, does it show that and support that? If you’re mathematical, is there a space for calculators, a whiteboard, pencils and graph paper? If you’re handy, do you have a workspace for cutting, nailing, building? Can someone walk into your environment and see any tell-tale signs of your inner You being nurtured?  They should be able to. Just because you have the best goods and services in your life, a McMansion, a BMW, Juicy Couture wardrobe, etc. doesn’t mean that your self-esteem is going to be uplifted accordingly. You might look like you’ve got solid self-esteem, but unless those things are truly, truly the pot and fertilizer your inner self requires they’re not going to deliver much of value.

Pruning can lead to flowering and grace – spend your energy in the right places.
I never thought that cutting off a limb (or several!) could be so good. When it’s planned, it sure is. The skin on the tops of my hands has only just healed from all the scratches…(next time – gloves) but I pruned away what seemed like 1/4 of a small, creeping tree in my front yard — and just a couple days later I saw the first purple flowers come. Just like that.

Plants grow faster and are healthier and more productive when they spend their energy growing in specific, focused directions (i.e., it’s one reason why we pinch suckers off tomato plants).

Translation:  if you’re spending energy supporting activities that aren’t contributing to your growth, that’s wasted energy. It’s the difference between running in circles and grace.

Be kind to yourself.


  1. Carl says:

    Hi Amy:
    Great timing with this message. Two things, 1. I visit your site almost daily for encouraging reading and reminders that I have and am continuing to heal wonderfully from the inside out. O Happy Day. 2. My wife and I want to do more to create a nurturing home environment for us as a couple deeply in love.
    It’s funny that we have this deep appreciation for each other and yet we seem to have created few vehicles ( read: planned activities, and home environment changes ) Granted, serious health issues have required us to avoid being weekend warriors. Onward and upward. I am so grateful for your site.

    • Amy Eden says:

      Thanks for the comment, Carl. While I wrote the post with just one person in mind, I actually want to write a version for couples! (Stay tuned…)
      Health is a priority, it must come first…wasn’t it Maslow who documented that only when our health and safety are secure can we tend to our interests and pursuits and then flourish?
      Ah, it was:
      O Happy Day indeed!

  2. [...] Please consider liking the Facebook page for The Kind Self Healing Book:  Raise Yourself Up with Curiosity and Compassion. On a related note, this post poses the question:  Do you have a nurturing environment in which you can grow? [...]

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